coming to fruition

who can tell what you will finish
what will come to completion

in slow steady increments or
off and on over the passing of many years or
faster than you'd expect
in a way you wouldn't expect
with unexpected help that comes from the left
when you thought the winds of opportunity
came from the right

i have this scarf-to-be
i keep it in a white ikea cardboard box
i've been taking it for rides
from bc to montreal to rimouski
and westward again
if when searching through my stuff i unexpectedly find it there
i'll sometimes add on and knit one row
or two
smiling at the 100% pure lack of goal-orientation
but enjoying the long haul participation
then it's back in the box
2 knitted lines longer
the fine wool i bought on a day trip to saltspring island
back in (frikkin')1995

who can tell what will complete itself
what will come to fruition 
what will bring satisfaction
from a to z, will the going be easy
are renovated houses and unfinished businesses
telling you whether or not
you are in a good spot



i have this longing and a longer even
a taste for music, very inclined to sing
i dive in guitar chords youtubes and gagage band
i show you my tune
you show me yours then i'm out
focus fanning out to various realms
guitars collecting dust
then some string get stuck i'm back again
new fancy chords i'm humming a song i'm making a move
over the years i've so prayed and wished
to get a band together to get a trio swinging over
getting me some solid mean black motherf***n' bass player
drummer boyfriend! where are the bands the hunks
the jams the gigs the joys

how can you tell what will take time
lots-O-time
and what will come quickly
easy and meant-to-be

ain't got no rhythmic section yet
no gigs and no tours
but couldn't resist and joined in the local choir
the joys are subtler but they can erupt unexpectedly
endorphine bliss shared in simple camaderie
minor keys harmonies
breathing deeply and our ears fine-tuning
with a delightfull-powered director

so vast and diverse our repertoire
so vast and diverse humans we are
no big band backing my blowings
but next to me are 2 fine sopranos gals
singing vigourously off-key
i learn to be patient to listen to concentrate
to find the right pitch within
and stand firm for that dramatic note
when the soprano boat
threatens to wobble and implode 
the whole choir
in survival mode


***
there are magical occurances
vague dreams becoming crisp realities
undreamed-of job opportunities
that combine and require various skills and interests
i just happen to have

major and minor transitioning smooth sailing
grateful for the support, loving to open and see
strong in the body
some illusions have left the house
they just couldn't deal with the peace anymore


***
will i ever complete this scraf-to-be
or harmonize with the finest
i don't know anymore
what is meant to appear or complete quickly
how much maturing needs to be

yet i feel all my dreams are coming true
although not in the expected shape
or desired time due